I went into the week not having a clue of what it would be like.. except for hot! it was nice having no expectations!
The bus ride down there was fantastic. I slept almost the ENTIRE time, and praise the Lord I got 2 seats the entire round trip. I couldn't stop thanking Him that He looks out for the little things, even my back pain :)
We arrived in Panama City Beach, and as soon as I saw Shelbi outside the bus my excitement bubbled over! I hate not being able to share long bus rides with her anymore, but her always being there as I step off the bus to give me the biggest hug ever created is the next best thing. We got our room assignments, and even though I wasn't put with Shelbi and Colleen, I couldn't wait to hang out with all the girls in our conjoining rooms!!! Little did I know that Tabitha (and Po) would turn out to be the most fun person to share sleeping quarters with... :)
OK, fine, here comes the most humbling thing I have ever put online.
Spiritually this week at BnB I was out of it. I was tired (both physically and spiritually) beyond belief. During the worship sessions, the Encounter times, the messages, and small groups I had hardly any participation. I just didn't want to be there. I was really homesick (for the first time in my life), and I just shut anything God was trying to say to me out. I acknowledged my hard heart, but I also didn't want to do anything to change the fact of its existence.
On Wednesday night I started feeling the Holy Spirit softening my heart, even if I only let him soften it a little, and for the first time that week I put my hands up during one of the songs. It felt so great to truly worship.
Following worship we had an incredible speaker from India share a snippet of his story, and my focus was not waned for a second. I just soaked up his bravery, his testimony, and his challenges to us to stand up for our faith, especially in the small, everyday things, even when everyone else is sitting down. Sounds cliche when I type it, but it was anything but.
After he spoke we watched a 90 minute documentary called "Love Costs Everything" depicting the stories of 5 or 6 families/individuals who had experienced the unthinkable in devotion to our God. I really want to watch it again, because it was probably my favorite thing about the week, but they also played in on the last night starting it at 915 PM. Everyone was exhausted, and it was all I could do to keep my eyes open and reading the subtitles. Such an encouragement, though. But even more of a challenge.
From that night til the next when we left, the Spirit grew stronger and stronger within me, and I felt like I was back to being the Danielle Merante I am... madly in love with my Jesus and trying to pursue Him as He meets me right where I am.
Some other highlights of the trip:
- talking with Shelbi.. laughing, confessing, and laughing some more. I am so blessed to have that girl as a best friend.
- talking with Juli.. actually more like just crying while I laid in her lap on the beach. She made missing home a little more bearable.
- talking with Tabs.. late into the night as we laughed hysterical, she cupped her ears, and Po was flung around giving kisses and comfort.
- talking with Lydia.. I missed Maya so much on this trip, and Lydia being able to talk to me and seek my counsel felt so good. I felt useful and needed, and Lydia is such a good friend. I'm so proud of her!
- talking with Stacie.. she listened to my story and gave me awesome counsel. And she also answered some questions I had... HA!
- talking with Emily.. from experiencing her beautiful face after waking up on the bus on the way there to finding each other every 15 minutes to say hello because our time apart from each other killed us. and our fun day on the dolphin cruise thing. and talking about boys. and lack of salad forks. and laughing at inappropriate times during worship. i love that girl.
- just laughing with my friends. those girls are the best thing God has put in my life, and I'm so grateful for that!!
- the weather. it was phenomenal!!! LOVING this tan..
- seeing dolphins. and swimming with them! OK, that 2nd part was a lie.
- the morning show. OK that was a lie, too.
- Po.
So there's my week. Hard, but good. Realized a lot of things. Admitted a lot of things. Hugged a lot of things. God's still a'workin!
This brings a smile to my face. Spending a week with you was so much fun! Our chats into the wee hours of the night will always be fun memories!! Thanks for being a friend to me and to Po (not his name). We both miss you!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteAnd yes.....the morning show was a highlight on my trip too.....ok I lied too. Maybe if I was in 2nd grade....lol