Pressure

I've never really thought much about pere pressure. I mean, I can see it and its effects, but I never really got pulled into the whole messy process...
Until now. Well kinda. I mean I've just been thinking about it a lot more lately. You see, almost every one of my friends has a boyfriend or someone of that nature. My sister's getting married. My best friend is dating the "most wanted" guy in our high school. My friends are always going on dates or hanging out with their boys. And I'm here. Thirty minutes away from everyone at school. No boyfriend. And different. And I always thought it was a good different, but I see how my life doesn't attract many, and quickly pushes the ones that are slightly interested away. But it's me. I'm different, and I've always been happy with that. And I still am. It's just tough.
Concerning boys, I'm pretty sure there's a guy out there who's actually pretty cute, likes me, and would be a fantastic boyfriend. I know he'd make me happy and I'd love it, but I don't get the butterflies. I don't get all nervous and giggly around him or wait for him to text. And I don't want a boyfriend for the sake of having a boyfriend. But I often think of how much happier I'd be.
It's wrong (I KNOW!) to look away from God for happiness, but it's difficult not to. No excuse. I know. But I would like someone here physically. I don't know.... Just a lot on my mind lately. Everything's changing. Everyone's changing. Including me.